2021 Resolutions
Finally, we have said goodbye to 2020. Like literally the rest of the world, I am so happy to see the year change. However, I am also being very mindful of the fact that, at least for a little while, things may look the same in everyday life. And it's strange to me to try to set out goals for this year when it feels like I have literally been yanked to a stop in life. I'm lucky enough that my life hasn't actually been stopped -- I can still make progress in several areas of my life -- but the pacing has shifted everywhere and it feels like the weight of each aspect of my life has changed as well. It's strange. It's weird. And as I sit here, I can't in certainty say what this means for me. I'm not sure what I want my life to look like. I can't say how I want to have grown coming out of the pandemic. So I don't know how I'm supposed to look at the year in front of me and pin aspirations to its timeline.
I think... hold on. -xo-xo-xo-xo-xo-xo-
Okay. I think I will give myself one definable goal, and then a general overall theme for the year.
Actually Read the Books in My Sense & Sensibility "Course"
Last year I was really hoping to read a whole bunch of British literature written by female authors. And then the semester started in January and that didn't really happen. Now though, I ~think~ I have a lighter course load and I really want to at least read those books. Maybe I'll read them in order, maybe I won't. I just want to have fun with them and pick through them for pure enjoyment throughout the year. As I go along, maybe I'll review them or something and add a tag to group them all together.
This one is like a major "huh????" for the general person. What do I mean by this? I think I just mean to take everything a little less seriously and to be less stressed about the direction of my life. I have no way to phrase it other than "my younger self." I don't know exactly.... I think back to when I was 10, 12, 15, whatever it was and yes, I was stressed, but I was also just living. Each day was a huge f***ing deal and every moment was fully embraced. Now, I think I'm so caught up in the "plans" for things that I am literally unable to be fully immersed in the actual goings on of my present life. Gonna try to change that back. :)
Last year I gave myself some more concrete goals, and that was fine enough. At least for a little while before the pandemic wrecked havoc on the world. But looking at what I've "given myself" for the upcoming year, I feel really good about it because it gives me the room to breathe and room for the world around me to shake up a bit as I fumble along. And hopefully, these are closer to long-lasting changes than just resolutions and I'll hold onto them past this year.
Thanks for reading and thank God for 2021!!!!
